You know what's the only thing better than a Black Hat?

FIVE BLACK HATS!!!

When you're surrounded by clones of Black Hat it's normal that among so much evil sexiness one gets overwhelmed and doesn't know where to start. That's why I have made my...

GUIDE TO THE DIFFERENT

(but equally sexy)

BLACK HAT CLONES

1) BLACK HAT #02

He's almost identical to the original Black Hat. But for some reason he doesn't have his powers. However, his murderous look, overhwhelming rage, loud voice, and original's malice are all intact. Or I should I say they were? Black Hat recently used it to test out a new weapon for a client and turned it into stone. If anyone knows where I can find that statue, tell me, I need it for-... my art collection. Yeah, that.

2) MONSTER BLACK HAT

This Black Hat is quite a beast... No, seriously, he's a 4 meteer wild monster with big drooling fangs and a devious look. Aaah, he's so cute!

3) DUMB BLACK HAT

(Better known as "Earl")

This Black Hat is small and silly, but he is very cute. We named him "Earl" because that's what a tag in his pocket said. I think he was created by the monster Black Hat with the ray of evil. His current location is unknown.

That isn't true! You stole the shorty Black Hat from my lab and won't give him back!

AND I NEVER WILL!!!

4) BLACK HOT

OOOH!! What can I tell you about Black Hot?! He's a beautiful specimen with the most sculpted, herculean, solid, oiled body, and with washboard abs of not only six, but EIGHT packs. He is without a doubt one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen in my life.

What are you talking about, Demencia? He's a giant voluptuous monster that stole our identities in an attempt to use us as bait to lure out the real Black Hat!

But have you seen his pecs?

5) BLACK HAT

(The original):

My handsome, horrible original husband. So vile, repulsive, and evil. There is no other like him, but his variations, although not identical, aren't bad at all, eh?

As you can see, after observing them well, there are very specific differences between each of the Black Hats. Each one is beautiful in it's own repulsive and hideous way. But they all share something in common:

THEY LOVE ME!!!

Here is a picture of me going on a date with all my husbands: